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carnivour:

may the wings of your eyeliner always be even.

159218 likes as of 5:30 pm / Share this text post

klartie:

"we’re having mcdonalds for dinner"

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"i made cookies"

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"i did your laundry for you" 

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"we’re going out you’ll be home alone for a few hours" 

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561324 likes as of 5:30 pm / Share this text post
Posted at 5:30 pm on a Tuesday
personofcolour:

US foreign policy summed up by Spongebob

muscleluvr2:

oh youre a son? name 5 of your parents

284676 likes as of 5:30 pm / Share this text post
Posted at 5:30 pm on a Sunday

psychoshango:

you ever notice how in women’s razor commercials the models’ legs are already completely hairless before they “shave” them

like we can’t even handle showing body hair in a commercial about how to get rid of body hair

178850 likes as of 5:30 pm / Share this text post
Posted at 5:30 pm on a Friday
Posted at 5:30 pm on a Thursday
flowergirlrobichiko:

thecatsmustbecrazy:

special delivery

BRING ME SCHRÖDINGER’S HEAD
Posted at 5:30 pm on a Wednesday
Posted at 5:30 pm on a Tuesday